Half Sibs popping up everywhere

A while ago, I peeked at this site called the Donor Sibling Registry. It's where you can go if you've had a kid via donor sperm or iggs and register to look for genetic half-sibs. I was floored to see a couple of half-sibs for my boys. I registered and eventually got an email and found half-sibs in Florida, New York and Ohio. Then a few days ago got another email from another half-sib in California with word of twin boys in Texas and another half sib in New York. Except for the Texans and the latest New York boy, we've all exchanged photos etc. I have to say there is definitely a family resemblance between the kids -- they are all darned cut.

But it's been an interesting journey for me. I mean, I've had to come to grips with exactly how self-centered it was for me to have kids this way vs. adoption. I mean, there is a little genetic "ownership" going on, let's not kid ourselves. It's cool to see that they look kind of like their half sibs but at the same time, part of me feels like those are just parts of them that couldn't come from my genes. Not that I care really.... but it's just sort of weird. With a donor "father" I've just come to think of them as mine and Steph's. I see all sorts of things that remind me of both of us -- and sometimes I catch myself thinking they inherited some genetic trait or another from her. Until those half-sibs come into view, it's like the other half of the boys' genetic material just sort of fell from the sky. Then it's weird to think that my boys are related to all these kids I have zero relationship to. But I'm getting used to it. We're looking forward to meeting one of the half-sisters on our cruise this summer and I wonder how that will feel.

Then there are the parents. So far, in email contact only, they seem very cool and nice etc. But what if in person they are horrible, awful, annoying people? Will we have to be "friends" anyway? In reality, I sort of look at them as other parents of kids my boys' age -- we have more than average in common, too, given that we used the same donor. But in the end, it's not MY relatives we've found. It's the boys' relatives. And when they are old enough, it will be for them to decide what sort of relationship they want with them. As I see it, our job as parents is just to keep the lines open so they have the option. And if we develop friendships along the way, great.

In the meantime, I am very happy with our new allergist and eager to get the blood test results for Chas. I'm allowing myself to hope that we could add soy back to the mix which would open up so many possiblities it's crazy. Sadly, however, I've seen some sneezing today so I suspect we're in for a cold or two. Yuck.

And finally, today at storytime at the library, the story lady had to tell Eddie to be quiet. He reacted by puckering up and bursting into tears. I had to spend the rest of the time with him in a side room. When I tried to talk to him about it later, more puckering, chin quivering etc. I feel so bad for him, but I know he's going to have to get used to people not being thrilled with every little utterance from his mouth. But I don't have to like it and neither does he.